First off, ESPN stole my idea. Sure, maybe I can't prove it, but since when did that seem to matter in America, right? Hell, all I needs is 12 fame-seeking Flordians, a slick talkin' Hispanic lawyer, couple rolls of ducktape, and alot of imagination....and practically anything's fucking possible. Of course....everyone knows what I'm referring to....we've all been thinking about it.....its the overwhelming and possibly glaring similarities between, the recent NFL lockout and the current debate over the increase of the US debt limit.
Now, I'm not going to get into the facts of either case. Cause honestly, you wouldn't read it....and I really don't care to research it. I mean, lets admit it, it would be a great thesis paper to write for some college level course on economics or legal mediation, arbitration, poli-sci, whatever....but who we kidding, that shit ain't fly to read. I don't wanna write about it and you don't wanna read about it, so lets just leave it at that. (So how about you get to the fucking point already, dipshit!)
Cool.....Anyone remeber the movie Half-Baked, when Kenny spent his first night in jail. Fresh fish on the menu, everyone's after Kenny's cock-tail fruit, Squirrel-master coming outta left field, and Nasty-Nate's got the mark of the beast....devil/beast/naughtyjunglelove/666. (What a great quote movie, low quality, but great quotes). Anyway, I guess the point I'm trying to make is this..... this whole NFL lockout bullshit and United States Debt Limit Crisis debate non-sense is really starting to make me feel a lot like poor ole Kenny, sweating it out in prison. I mean Kenny was just a normal guy, getting by, trying to have a good time, fed the wrong horse, now Kenny's stuck in jail, freaking out and protecting his manhood.
I mean, shit, I'm like most people, I just wanna wake up on Sunday morning, check my bank account, know that the $215 in my checking account is still worth what is was last year, and that the Falcons are gonna piss me off again by squeaking out another snoozer w/ the Rams, at home, in the 4th quarter, by 2......right??
So why do I feel like the NFL owners & NFL players, along w/ ELECTED "representatives" in Congress are figuratively fucking me? Because, they are. See NFL owners/players and US politicians.....see they have something in common, they both need US. They need our passion, our hunger, our commitment, our desperation....and most of all...they need our $$$$! So they fuck us! How??
See, they know we love football....we want football. They know we need jobs. They know we like things simple, easy, traditional (to a certain exstint), normal. We don't want complications. Sure, its okay to just rock the boat a little.....get paid, get a little press, little publicity, re-elected, better pay, benefits.... I feel you, I really do! But holding fans and citizens hostage to the brink of what we've come to know and love, our freakin lively-hood.....over their greed and political games, just to make a little extra cash and score political points, well that's just fucking petty (even for politicians). "Hand's off Nasty-Nate.....find your own bitch!"! Fish is off the menu.
Now, I understand, that they (owners/players/politicians) may hold all the cards.....they have the leverage. So one way or the other.....we're gonna get fucked. But damn, at least tell me I'm pretty sometimes or better yet, respect me on Monday morning when I get up early, and go to work.....to pay your fucking salaries, you over/paid, over-rated, easily replaced, no-one will remember your names in 5 years DOUCHEBAGS!
(ESPN had a similar story about this, but as my lawyer will tell you, I had this idea first, and the truth will come out in trial).
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